A problem I faced in the last few months; I was terrified of wasting time. Something I always try to do is make the most of the time I have and force myself into things because I know I'll regret it if I don't try.
This always gave me an equal balance of 'me' time as well as social time by doing so. I never wanted to make more friends or get into a relationship, I was fine with my balance that made sure I had a bit of everything I needed and wanted basically.
Last week I was diagnosed as someone with severe depression and "critical" anxiety, and it made sense too. It got me out of my panicky bad place in my head that I had been in since June and remember who I was. I was able to separate emotion from logic once again thank god.
One of the biggest fears I'd developed was a fear of wasting time if I didn't play games with my partner. That everything would end soon and I had to make the most of it. It had become a dependency I didn't want in my life at all.
Now though, I have come to conclude that the time I spend with my boyfriend is to be cherished as it happens. Not worry about how little time we have and that we can't waste any of it. I am very grateful that I have managed to achieve a healthier balance of spending time with him, and having my own time to balance everything else. :)
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